


Out of context

by darkrogue1 (Lily_Haydee_Lohdisse)



Category: Kyou Kara Maou!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-06-01
Updated: 2007-10-05
Packaged: 2018-07-29 17:34:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7693327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lily_Haydee_Lohdisse/pseuds/darkrogue1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yuuri falls into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The spring of oblivion

**Author's Note:**

>   If you have any suggestion on the plot, make it. Or if you have any preference as to who should recognise Yuuri and call his name... (I have an idea of what I want to write, but I'm not sure I can get it right).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's inspired by my favourite fairytale of all times: Big-hat Hanasha.

  
Yuuri stood on the edge of a water hole he did not know, deep in thought and slightly depressed. He had discretely escaped from the castle after yet another fight with Wolfram, in search for a quiet place. Yuuri hated to fight, with Wolfram most of all.  
  
Yuuri sighed. Wolfram insisted they were betrothed  and despite their frequent clashes, still professed he loved him. Did he really? There were times when Yuuri feared Wolfram only liked him because of his status and power as the Maou. Today was one of those days...  
  
But Wolfram was not the only person he suspected of liking him only because of his status, or because of how he had been presented before his arrival in this country.  
  
Yuuri sighed again. He wished he could know what they all would think of him if they had not met in the same circumstances... but it was as useless as wondering how Conrad would behave if he had not Julia’s soul, was it? Besides he would never have met Wolfram if he had not come to this world to become the Maou.  
  
Kneeling, Yuuri put his hand in the cool spring water at his feet and splashed his face with it. He looked surprised and tried to stand, but he stumbled and fell into the pond, head first.  
  
~*****~  
  
When he emerged again, the boy stood up coughing and spluttering, fighting to stand against the heavy weight on his head. Trying to rub his eyes, he encountered something wooden which hindered him. He had to put his hand underneath it to manage chasing the water away from his eyes.  
  
Then he opened his eyes and found his vision was blocked by a visor of some kind, only it was not a normal grid visor.  
  
Putting both his hands up in surprised panic, he felt the thing on his head. It was a kind of hat. A large big wooden hat with very low sides which hid most of his face. Why did he have this hat on?  
  
Then he really panicked: he could not remember anything: neither why he had a hat, nor why he was there, nor where he was, worse, not even his own name.  
  
~*****~  
  
When the young man had calmed down enough, he went out of the water: after all, memory or not, it was not getting any warmer. Then another problem arose: he was naked and there were no clothes in sight.  
  
Well, his sight was rather limited. With this strange hat, he could only see a few feet away, literally. Tilting his head back, he tried to see further under the rim: still nothing. So he tried to remove it, but it was stuck. He could pull and pull and pull but it would not budge or get off his head. It seemed glued to his skull.  
  
He was in the midst of trying to put his hand between the hat and his head -- without any success -- when a clear feminine laugh interrupted him.  
  
Immediately, Yuuri put his hands down to cover himself and turned in the direction where the laugh had come from.  
  
One good thing about the hat was that it covered both his face and his blush, but the young man wanted to see who was there, so, face burning, he tilted his head backwards again.  
  
He looked like a fool like this, and the girl, looking at him, told him.  
  
"You really look strange. What happened to you? Someone played a prank on you?"  
  
It was a young brown-haired girl with happy blue eyes. Her dress was simple yet pretty and she showed neither fear nor hesitation looking at him.  
  
"I... can‘t remember," Yuuri admitted. "First thing I know is being in the water with this hat that doesn’t get off. I can‘t even remember my name," he said, rather dejectedly.  
  
"Oh! So it‘s another one?" The girl did not seem to really talk to him. Rather, she was thinking aloud. "Don’t mind me." She waved amiably at him. "I often talk to myself. And if you don‘t remember... Anyway, strange wells and springs have been appearing in the region recently. People who fall in can‘t remember anything until you call them by their names. It‘s just plain annoying... But I don’t know you, so it’s a problem. Well... " She took off her apron and handed it to him. " Here. Come back with me to the village, someone there might know you, and we will get you something to wear."  
  
Yuuri agreed wholeheartedly and put the apron on.  
  
~*****~  
  
The girl was just starting her business as an innkeeper, taking her father’s trade after both of her parents had died. The villagers liked her and seemed to know her well. On the contrary, no one knew the young man with the strange hat.  
  
They had found him plain clothes to keep and he had gladly given the apron up. So he was someone, probably a traveller, who had decided to take a bath in a spring of oblivion, right. It still did not explain where his clothes had wandered of to, or why he was wearing a hat that did not come off.  
  
As the night drew near, the girl he had met and was called Anna prepared him a place to sleep. Having nowhere to go, he gratefully accepted.  
  
~*****~  
  
When he woke up in the morning, the young man had no more memory than the night before. He knew things, sometimes it took him time to adjust and know exactly what it was. He had troubles with some words too.  
  
Thinking about it, he found he knew at least three languages. But Anna did not know either of the other two. He found out he could read and write as well, which was more than most of the people there.  
  
"Maybe you were going to the high valley, or coming from there," Anna told him. "Lots of priests go to the monastery to learn."  
  
"I’m a priest?" Yuuri asked.  
  
"Maybe," Anna answered. "You are educated."  
  
It was a possibility, it also was a place where to begin the search for his lost identity.  
  
After giving him directions. Anna bade him goodbye, wishing him luck on his journey.  
  
When he protested that he could not thank her for her generosity, she suggested he put a benediction on her home.  
  
"But you don’t know if I’m really a priest," the young man protested. "Besides I don’t know any benediction."  
  
"I don’t mind. It‘s all I ask in payment," she answered.  
  
Then she told him a benediction the monks used on buildings sometimes and he repeated it, concentrating on believing every word he said from the bottom of his heart.  
  
The wording felt familiar somehow: it called a power in his veins which felt right.  
  
As he left for the monastery in the valley, Anna watched the glow around the mysterious traveller with the big hat recede. Somehow she had the feeling her inn would prosper for years with this.  
  
  
  



	2. The spring of oblivion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. The girl he first met believed he was a travelling priest and directed him towards the valley’s monastery.

The directions had been clear and Yuuri found the place easily. It was a beautiful valley, full of trees, but the forests looked well cared for. On the southern side, up on the mountain flank, he could see an impressive stone building ; the monastery.  
  
Yuuri did not recognise the place, it did not evoke any memory in him, but Anna had told him that people who fell into oblivion springs did not recognise familiar places at all, not even their own houses. It was with this thought in mind that Yuuri walked forward, up the mountain, in the monastery’s direction.  
  
There was someone on watch at the wooden gate, so Yuuri did not have to wonder how to enter. But the monk at the entrance did not recognise him, so it did not bode well for his coming from there.  
  
When they learned of the reason for his visit, they had the head monk meet with him. It was an old bald wrinkled smiling man. He was friendly, but did not know him, no new visitor had written in advance either.  
  
After they made sure that no one knew the young man, they offered him to stay for a few days at least. He shared their everyday activities and learned. He learned their techniques very fast : everything came easily to him.  
  
"Maybe you really were a priest," they joked amiably with him. After all, maybe he was.  
  
 He had more trouble getting used to his hat, in most activities it was a handicap, and most of all, it limited his world to a few feet away.  
  
The monks started to call him Kasa after the strange shape of his hat, because after all ‘Big-Hat boy’ was not really a name. They were friendly. Life was easy and fun. Kasa did not feel the need to leave.  
  
~*****~  
  
Only a week after Kasa had arrived in the monastery, a messenger arrived from the east with a letter for the head monk. Shortly afterwards, the old man called for Kasa.  
  
"You know there has been a letter, " the old man said, watching him intensely.  
  
Kasa nodded.  
  
"A letter from Shinmakoku," he gravely went on.  
  
Kasa‘s eyes widened. " From where ?"  
  
The old monk smiled and sighed. "I keep on forgetting there are things you forgot." So he explained some geography. Shinmakoku was the neighbouring country in the East. The village where Kasa had been found was in Shinmakoku, but the valley belonged to the monastery.  
  
Then the old monk explained about the letter.  
  
~*****~  
  
Shinmakoku’s castle was in turmoil. Since the night the Maou had disappeared, searches had been conducted to find him. But when the king could not be easily located, things became serious.  
  
Yuuri’s friends and councillors had sent for help from Shinou’s castle, but it was in vain. Ulrike could not locate him either. She would look in her crystal ball for hours, but the Maou’s soul was nowhere in sight. The usually bright spot was missing and she could not find it anywhere in either world.  
  
They extended the searches’ radius and when Ulrike forfeited they decided to call for outside help. They sent notices to their allies, and contacted Ulrike’s colleagues. Of course they sent letters only to people they could trust not to harm the king if they found him. Still, the situation was bad and unexpected, they could use all the help they could find.  
  
They hoped for the king’s safety. If only he could be found soon !  
  
~*****~  
  
"So they want us to help them locate their lost king ?" Kasa asked after the old man had explained the situation to him.  
  
"Exactly."  
  
"Err, sorry… Why did you call for me then ?"  
  
The old man scratched his bald head. "Well, it would be a good opportunity for you to travel if you wish, and maybe discover who you are."  
  
"I’m going to Shinmakoku ? Why ? I mean, I‘m grateful you thought about me and all, but why don‘t you reply by letter ?"  
  
"Well…" The old man looked seriously at the hat, since he could not see the young man’s eyes. "They might want a proof or an explanation. Besides, they are a powerful neighbouring country and we are but a small valley : we want to show them that we really took the matter to heart." He paused. "Did you learn stone divination yet ?"  
  
"No, I didn‘t." Kasa replied sincerely. At least, he did not remember having learned it.  
  
"Let us try then," the old man said amiably. He took a map and a few small stones with engraved signs which had been on his desk when Kasa had arrived, carefully placed the map in the centre of the table, and handed the stones to Kasa.  
  
"What do I do with them ?" The young man asked.  
  
"Hold your hand above the map and concentrate on Shinmakoku’s king." The head monk directed him.  
  
Kasa followed his directions and looked down at the map.   
  
"Then open your hand."  
  
The stones fell on the map and rolled, then stopped. They were scattered in a rather random pattern, not two of them were even close.  
  
"There you are," the old man concluded.  
  
"I don’t think that was very helpful." Kasa commented, doubtfully. "It seems I have no talent for this."  
  
"On the contrary." The old man smiled. "This is the result we all have been getting ; we can‘t locate him either."  
  
"Uh? Oh. "  
  
"Well, I have to tell you that none of us wants to bring that news to Shinmakoku’s castle either. The Maou‘s fiancé is known for his fiery temper."  
  
" I understand." Kasa nodded. The life here agreed with him, but it still might be nice to have a chance to know who he was. Besides, the monks had been very helpful, and if he could help them with this travel… "When do I leave ?"  
  
~*****~  
  
Kasa learned a few other things before his departure. They quickly taught him some more about stone divination, which he learned as quickly as he had all the other things they taught him. Then, on the following morning, he bade his new friends farewell and walked down the mountain, away from the monastery and into Shinmakoku.  
  
"You don’t have to come back right away either," the head monk had told him, giving him a staff as a farewell present. "Take your time. Maybe you can meet with people you know, who knows ?"  
  
And so, with priest clothes, a walking staff and his big wooden hat, Kasa slowly made his way to Shinmakoku’s capital.  



	3. Meeting the demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name: Kasa. Now he is being sent on a mission to Shinmakoku’s capital city and castle: tell the Maou’s fiancé and advisors that the monks cannot find their king either.

  
Kasa walked for days before he arrived at his destination. On the way he admired the riches of Shinmakoku’s land, but was appalled at some villages’ poverty. He stopped in a particularly beaten down group of houses and asked about their conditions of life.

"Oh, no! It’s really getting better." He was answered by the inhabitants. "The situation has been improving ever since the new Maou came to power."

Kasa did not wish to imagine how it might have been before. It was a good thing that the Maou everyone tried so hard to find was a good person, or at least a good king; but Kasa felt that whatever the Maou did was not enough. Before he left, he discretely spoke the same benediction he had on Anna’s inn. Maybe it could help those people somewhat.

~*****~

Kasa did not know why, but as he walked, he found himself wishing for more shops along the road. Like tea-stands. Did they have some in the place he came from? The closer he came to his destination, the richer the villages and building were. He bought Maou manjus in a town, some kind of doughnut. Everywhere he went, he listened to the people’s opinion about the Maou, and was surprised at the near unanimous liking of the king.

Finally he arrived in view of Shinmakoku’s castle. At the end of a forest, further in the plain, he could see the tall building on a hill, proud and majestic. It really was an impressive building, dominating the whole land around. It also was a very pleasant sight, which announced the end of his current journey. It was a sight that made Kasa want to shout his joy. It was with enthusiasm that he completed the last part of his journey.

It was midmorning when Kasa started to climb up the slope going to the castle. He had a weird feeling. People in the city turned around when he passed by, looking at his hat and whispering. In the countryside, people had been too busy with their own lives to mind it much, but here it did garner attention. Kasa felt like a rare artefact or a strange animal on display. He could not say he liked that kind of attention too much.

~*****~

There were guards at the castle’s gate, but it was open. The courtyard was in chaos. Soldiers were running around, completing last minute errands in the midst of the horses which were waiting for them. Already on his brown horse, the commanding officer was urging his men on, giving his last orders. He seemed very charismatic and looked young, although Kasa had heard that with demons, it did not mean much. Then the brunette turned his head in the direction of the gate and saw him.

The man dismounted and walked towards him, quickly disappearing from Kasa’s field of vision as the young man with the big hat put his head back in a more normal position.

"Good morning brother." The voice was pleasant to the ears, but still sounded strained and stressed. Kasa felt weird. He still had not become used to be called ‘brother’. It was a name he had difficulties to relate to. But it felt it would seem weirder to be called ‘father’ like some other priests. In a way, being a father definitely sounded familiar though... more than ‘brother’ anyway, but either would still sound weird coming from this man: he seemed older than him in any case.

"Do you bring any news ?" There was such worry in this voice, and Kasa could feel the man’s eyes bore through his hat. This was the intensity of his care for the Maou. Instantly, Kasa knew who was in front of him. It must be Sir von Bielefeld; the king’s fiancé was organising yet another search party to comb the land and find his betrothed.

Kasa stood a bit more upright and searched for a diplomatic way to formulate his answer. How could he deceive such hope, how could he explain that he could not be of any help? "I..."

"I apologise." He was interrupted before he could really speak. "To ask you such a question just when you arrive and have not had time to settle..." Apparently the demon had just remembered that he was a prince, and that, from a small country or not, Kasa was a foreign diplomat of a kind.

"No it‘s all right," Kasa reassured him. He understood this man was very worried about his Maou. People could react weirdly when their loved ones were taken from them. Kasa held him no ill-will for his rather normal behaviour.

"Still I insist. I will bring you inside. Sir von Bielefeld, von Voltaire, and von Christ are organising the searches, and Wolfram certainly will want to hear you first." Then the officer noticed he had not introduced himself. "I‘m Conrad Weller, captain of the Maou‘s personal guard."

Oh? It seemed Kasa had made a case of mistaken identity. While he was standing there, wondering about his error, Sir Weller called one of his men to give a few more instructions.

"Karl, you are in command. You know what to do," Captain Weller said. "I’ll join you as soon as I can."

"Yes, sir. "

Then the man in brownish uniform turned back towards Kasa. "If you would come with me, brother."

"People call me Kasa," he answered before following him, careful not to let his boots out of his sight.

~*****~

The castle was a strange but rich place; rooms were big and spacious. Kasa was led to a room where three people were organising maps and papers. Upon entering the room, he quickly raised his head to see where he was headed and caught a glimpse of them. One had dark long hair and was sitting at a desk in a worried and concentrated posture. Kasa did not see it from this end of the room, but he was sure the man had at least four wrinkles on his forehead. The two others were standing over the table.

The two others were beautiful.

On the left was a mature beauty with long silver hair. It was the kind of person who could live by his looks only. On the right was a younger person, with blond curly hairs. The light played just the right way in those strands, and in the short glimpse Kasa had of him, he believed he could see the sun‘s glories around his head. He was a beautiful cute adolescent. He spoke and moved with passion in his suggestions, but at the same time, he carried a melancholic beauty of someone who had been separated from his lover.

This time Kasa knew he was right. This person was the beautiful Wolfram von Bielefeld, the Maou‘s fiancé.

Stepping forward while Conrad Weller introduced him, Kasa tried to mentally prepare himself to announce his rather bad news -- or lack of news -- to this beautiful young person.  



	4. The Maou’s fiancé

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name: Kasa. Now he is on a mission in Shinmakoku’s capital and castle: he has to tell the Maou’s fiancé and advisors that the monks cannot find their king either.

  
"So, what news do you bring? Did you find him? Any clue?" There was such hope in the blond demon’s voice that Kasa’s heart hurt just at the thought that he would have to crush it.  
  
Kasa swallowed and cleared his throat. "There is both good and bad news," Kasa started, trying to soften the delivery. "The bad news is that we have not been able to find him: it is as if he had disappeared from this world‘s map."  
  
Someone on his right sighed -- the one dressed in white. On the contrary, the blond demon seemed to gain energy from this inauspicious announcement.  
  
"Then why did you even bother to come and tell us! You are useless!"  
  
The Maou’s fiancé was obviously very disappointed so Kasa ignored his outburst. Sir Weller did not say anything, but his stance also showed his discouragement at the news. The seated person -- was he still frowning? -- broke the silence. "What was the good news?"  
  
Kasa came back to himself and the situation at hand. "When people come to us to locate someone, well, we don’t always find them alive." Kasa did not pause so that they would not draw their own hasty conclusions. "The good news is that we can‘t locate a body either; you may not be sure he is still alive, but at least you are not sure he is dead."  
  
This did not seem to placate Sir von Bielefeld much. "What do you mean, good news!? This is useless! Really you monks are a lazy bunch of stupid pig-headed…"  
  
"Stop right here!" Kasa interrupted him, quite angered, his hand half raised. He was fighting the urge to actually hit the beautiful young prince.  
  
"I would understand if you blamed the messenger, but don’t say such things about hardworking people you know nothing about! Really! You are lucky monks are non-violent!"  
  
"They are?" The lavender-haired other beautiful person sounded very surprised and Kasa laughed sheepishly.  
  
"Err, well, I like to believe Benkei is an exception," he muttered embarrassedly.  
  
"I beg your pardon?" This time the exclamation had come from Sir Weller and Kasa was feeling even more embarrassed. Now they all must think he was not a very good ambassador.  
  
Kasa wanted to put his hand behind his head, but he had already found out a long time ago that it was a move that his hat prevented. So he just reddened and muttered. "It‘s the cook‘s nickname at the monastery." He still did not know himself why he had decided to nickname him that way. The name had come to him naturally the first time he had seen the man.  
  
The silence stretched. Kasa could feel everyone’s stare through his hat and suddenly he wanted to disappear. Sir Weller’s eyes lingered on him for a few moments before he turned towards the door. Kasa also turned towards him, and the soldier stopped. "How soon did you plan to depart? Do you already have any accommodation in town?" His tone was gentle and Kasa immediately took it as a polite inquiry, not as an urge to leave.  
  
"I don’t know. I don’t have anything planned."  
  
"Well then. Wolfram, Gwendal, Gunther." Sir Weller saluted the demons in turn. "We‘ll leave you to your work."  
  
Kasa followed the brown boots outside the room.  
  
~*****~  
  
"You might want to rest and refresh a bit after such a long journey," Sir Weller jovially stated once in the corridor. "I‘ll show you to your room before heading out."  
  
"Thank you very much." Kasa followed him, but the silence felt heavy so he spoke anew. "I‘m sorry to delay you, and not to bring better news."  
  
But if Sir Weller resented him, it did not show in his voice. "These few minutes won‘t make much of a difference."  
  
They went quite a distance before they arrived in front of a door in a small side tower.  
  
"Here you are." The soldier paused. "May I ask how long you will stay? "  
  
Kasa suddenly felt embarrassed, the question was much more pointed than earlier. "I don‘t know. I was told I mustn‘t go back immediately but rather follow my feelings," he mumbled. "I mean..." He took a more assured tone. "My mission is not finished. I don‘t want to leave until then."  
  
Kasa would have went on if the man had not interrupted him. The young man with the big hat could actually hear the warm smile in his voice. "This is not farewell then. We’ll certainly meet again when I come back in a few days."  
  
"Oh." Kasa felt reassured somehow to know that it had not been a question showing he was not welcome. "Good luck then."  
  
"Good bye."  
  
Kasa listened to the steps echoing down the stairs before he entered the room.  
  
~*****~  
  
The room felt like a relief to Kasa -- or maybe a dream. Somehow it was also strange to tell himself that he had such a large room entirely for himself!  
  
Kasa rested for a bit, but most of all he would have liked to remove his heavy hat, set the load aside for a few moments. He thought back to the last hours, about the first impression he got from the demons and especially the fiery blond prince.  
  
But quickly he felt restless and exited his room again.  
  
~*****~  
  
In the castle’s corridors and main courtyard he met with the inhabitants and servants, stopping to speak with some of them.  
  
The liking of the king was unanimous and Kasa wondered about this country’s political health. Was it really such a good country? Wasn’t it that a ruling without opposition was not a good government?  
  
There was no official meal at noon -- apparently the Maou’s advisors and fiancé had taken the habit to eat quickly while they kept working on finding their king, and worrying -- so Kasa ate in the kitchen with the servants.  
  
In the afternoon, he started roaming about the castle again, wondering why he felt so drawn to this situation: he did not even know this king or country! Well, at least he had no memory of either of them.  
  
Kasa let his feet carry him forward, not thinking about any particular destination until, coming down a flight of stairs after getting to the top of a tower, he stopped mesmerised.  
  
A few meters away, leaning against a window frame, watching outside and seemingly lost in his thoughts was the magnificent Wolfram von Bielefeld.  
  



	5. The blond prince and the black-haired black-eyed demon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name: Kasa. Gone on a mission to Shinmakoku’s capital and castle, he met with the demons.

Wolfram von Bielefeld was looking through an open window, his cheek cupped in the palm of one of his hands, his elbow resting against the stone. The sun played on his face as he looked towards the courtyard below, towards the gate.  
  
Kasa stayed mesmerised on the stairs, stricken by the beauty of the young blond person.  
  
After a while he finally finished going down the stairs, keeping the sweet image in his mind if he could no longer witness it directly with his eyes. Sometimes Kasa hated his hat.  
  
"Hello," he greeted the prince who, lost in his reverie, had not heard him coming.  
  
Startled, Wolfram turned towards him. "Hello," he said, slowly, once he had identified the newcomer.  
  
They remained silent a few moment, then Kasa had to break the silence as an excuse for staying. "You were right earlier," he stated. "The news I brought was of no use. I should not have spoken in such a manner."  
  
Wolfram shook his head. Then, noticing that perhaps the monk had not seen that movement he spoke up: "I should have kept my temper in check as well. Yuuri would never have wanted me to burst out in front of a foreign dignitary." Then for himself, in a voice so low that Kasa almost missed it, he murmured: "Even if that‘s how we met."  
  
"You love him very much," Kasa remarked, somewhat wistfully.  
  
"Of course!" Wolfram exclaimed, suddenly on the defensive. "He‘s my fiancé."  
  
"Then you don‘t have to worry." Kasa tried to placate him from behind his hat. "He is sure to come back to such a beautiful person." Then he added sincerely, "I know I would."  
  
Wolfram blushed furiously. "What are you saying!!? Don’t be so familiar! I‘m the Maou‘s fiancé!" He stormed off.  
  
Kasa raised his head to watch his retreat, not thinking much of the prince's reaction to his sincere words. His thoughts went instead to the missing king. It really was worrisome if he did not come back to his beloved and loving if somewhat fiery fiancé.  
  
~*****~  
  
Full of those sombre thoughts, Kasa walked back towards the courtyard where he was originally headed.  
  
Just as he was coming down the stairs, a skinny dark silhouette was passing through the gate, coming in. This person was dressed in black and had black hair. One of the guards hurried towards him, as if he was someone they had been waiting for. Kasa had heard that only the Maou could wear black, but it could not be this person, could it?  
  
Perplexed, he watched as the person drew nearer, walking towards the castle's main stairs. He caught a reflection of glasses in the light but no details of the newcomer’s face before it disappeared from his view under the hat.  
  
The person stopped at his height, pondering for a second.  
  
"Oh! Good morning." The was then greeted by a cheery if somewhat nasal voice. "You must be the monastery‘s envoy we were waiting for. Pleased to meet you. I‘m Murata Ken and…" Suddenly he paused, and Kasa shifted under the scrutiny he could sense. "And I’m also the Great Sage." Murata went on more slowly, savouring each word as it went out of his mouth. Kasa did not really like the smirk he could hear in the young man’s voice. "But you may call me ‘Oh Great One‘," he said, jubilant.  
  
"Oh, Great One?" Kasa repeated rather dubiously. Somehow he knew this preposterous demon was mocking him, even if he did not know why.  
  
Not letting Kasa speak any further, not even bothering to ask him if he had any news of the king as everyone else had done until then, Murata left him there. "Well, it was nice meeting you. See you next time."  
  
Puzzled, Kasa remained standing on the stairs. He had a weird feeling about this so-called sage. He most certainly did not like him much.  
  
~*****~  
  
It was a grinning Sage who entered the meeting room where the maps for the searches were displayed. His smile even grew further as he saw the defeated faces of the other demons.  
  
"Hmm. Giving up already?" He teased them. "Just when I was bringing some good news."  
  
"Good news?" Wolfram’s head perked up. Gwendal and Gunther also seemed very interested.  
  
"Yes, I believe I know why no one can locate Shibuya." He paused, enjoying the effect. Immediately the room had become more lively. Hope was such a powerful thing.  
  
"Do you remember the reports we first got a few weeks ago?" He went on. "About interesting oblivion springs." At the time, the subject had picked his interest, as it did anytime something influencing memory was mentioned.  
  
"What about them?" Gwendal asked, intent on getting further explanations.  
  
"I believe Shibuya might have ended up in one of them somehow. He has lost his memory, this is why we cannot find him," Murata finished, very proud of himself.  
  
"Oh! Your Majesty!" Gunther exclaimed rather randomly, his imagination running wild about what the king might be doing with no memory of who he was.  
  
"Well," Murata spoke up again. "I‘m going to investigate those springs further. It really seems interesting… so if you‘ll excuse me."  
  
He left the room, smiling at the door. He would have fun watching everyone act in the next days. But he would also make some additional research. Forgetting some things could be useful for someone like him…  



	6. Secrets unearthed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name: Kasa. Gone on a mission to Shinmakoku’s capital and castle, he met the demons.

  
Kasa settled in rather quietly. He wanted to wait until the Maou was found before he left. Apparently, the demons had found a more promising lead than what he had brought them, because after this day, they had been very busy. Messengers had been sent in flock to the search parties, and new ones had been organised.  
  
Kasa had even seen beautiful Gunther von Christ himself ride away with a few men. The rumour was he had gone back to a monastery he had frequented before, but Kasa did not know any more. He could not know that Gunther went there because it had become the meeting point of people who had lost their memories. He could not imagine either how the lavender-haired demon greeted personally each newcomer, sometimes even calling them ‘Your Majesty’.  
  
As the time passed, Kasa learned about the demonic ways. But people were still wary of him: he was a foreigner. His hat must not help either. At first it had just been a simple traveller’s accessory, but when he never removed it, it started becoming suspicious.  
  
One morning, Kasa learned that Conrad Weller’s search party had come back late during the night. They came back empty handed however.  
  
Later that day, passing through the gardens, he spotted the man in a secluded place, sitting on a stone bench half-hidden by hedges. The soldier looked depressed. Kasa stopped. He thought for an instant, wondering if he should disturb the man’s privacy, but he did not like to see people unhappy, so he walked towards him.  
  
The brunet was really deep in thought, because he did not even move when Kasa came closer, only when he sat down next to him did he seem to notice him.  
  
"Good morning." Kasa did not apologise for disturbing him, after all it had been his intent. "You look down."  
  
"Good morning." Conrad’s voice seemed tired. The attempt of a smile that filtered through his words did not last long. He did not speak immediately thereafter, but he made no move to leave and did not ask Kasa to let him be alone either. Kasa waited for him to speak and after a few seconds, the soldier indeed broke the silence. "We did not find him," he said quietly.  
  
Kasa felt sympathetic. He pitied him. There was so much pain hidden in that voice. But what could he answer to that? None of them had found the king yet, and with each passing day, the chances of finding him alive also went down.  
  
"But you had to come back, to rest," he said in a tone that wanted to sound reasonable.  
  
"Yes," Conrad acknowledged tiredly. "But we will go back to search as soon as we can," he added then with more energy.  
  
Only Kasa sensed that he did not really believe it. "Did you rest at all?" He asked.  
  
"I am resting."  
  
"No. I mean, sleep, do something else than worry, let others carry that burden for even a few minutes." Kasa saw the man tense again at his side.  
  
"I can‘t." There was pleading in that voice. A desperate want to cling to a hope which would disappear if Conrad let go for even a second.  
  
"Why? " Kasa asked simply. Maybe it was harsh to this man, but he could see that he needed an outlet of some sort.  
  
"I told him, you know." Conrad began softly, beginning directly with the heart of his problem. "I as good as promised him that I would not cry if he died." The way he said it made Kasa uneasy somehow, like something even bigger was hidden behind those words, something that Kasa could not comprehend. "And now…" He let the end of the sentence trail off and Kasa finished it for him.  
  
"Now you can‘t because you don’t know if he is alive anymore?"  
  
Conrad nodded slowly. "I always believed that I would know," he said almost pleadingly. "That if anything happened to him I would know…"  
  
Kasa did not like to hear such suffering. "Then believe it. Cry," he encouraged him. "You won‘t find him if your grief blinds you." Then he stated what was obvious to him. "Your love for him is so strong that it’s not healthy to suppress its consequences."  
  
"It is because I love him that I shouldn‘t cry," Conrad answered. Then he made a small involuntary movement, as if he regretted his last words.  
  
"I won‘t tell if that‘s what worries you," Kasa guessed. "But it‘s obvious."  
  
"Yuuri is my brother‘s fiancé," Conrad stated, his voice back to a normal and controlled, level tone.  
  
"And it‘s doubly hard on you. I think you should let yourself cry sometimes. It might do you good."  
  
Conrad nodded but did not answer. Kasa did not think he had convinced him either. At the same time, the soldier seemed a bit better, somewhat more energetic. Maybe just talking had been a relief for him. Did he ever speak about any of this to anyone else? For how long had he been carrying those secrets alone?  
  
Kasa left shortly thereafter, leaving the brunet some privacy.  
  
Kasa really pitied him. To see such a love unreturned was some kind of a tragedy. But it was so. Kasa wondered what the Maou thought about it. Did he know? He had to. There was no hiding a love of this magnitude. However the king was betrothed to Wolfram von Bielefeld. This must mean that he did not return Conrad Weller’s feelings.  
  
Love was a complicated thing. Then Kasa wondered if he might have loved someone, before he lost his memory. Right now he felt drawn towards the blond -- yet sadly already spoken for -- demonic prince, but had there been someone else before? Did he have a family? Was someone, somewhere, waiting for him, searching for him?  
  
Was he even really a priest?


	7. The long wait

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name : Kasa. Gone on a mission to Shinmakoku’s capital and castle, he stayed with the demons.

Week followed week. Things began to settle in a new routine for Kasa. While he waited without knowing why for the demons to find their king -- somehow he did not want to go back to the monastery until he had been found -- he tried to make himself useful. There was not much he could do. He was not even good with horses, and as a foreigner he did not have the trust of the demonic people.  
  
He stayed at the infirmary, where he had found he could be of some use to Gisela. People who would come there did not have the time or the mind to find Kasa’s hat strange, and Gisela seemed to adapt very easily to his reduced field of vision.  
  
She would have him help her prepare herb concoctions, or take care of the laundry. Meanwhile, Kasa was glad to have found someone to speak with in a regular manner.  
  
In his daily activities, he had taken to wander around the highest floor of the castle, particularly in the area which looked down on the part of the castle where Wolfram and the others held their daily meetings.  
  
He would spend a long time watching the young prince from above through the open windows, or wait for a glimpse of him if they were closed.  
  
Sometimes he would meet with him in the corridors, but it was rare that the blond prince stopped to exchange even a few words with him. He seemed aware of the attention he had garnered from the foreign guest and it did not seem to please him much so he was avoiding him.  
  
Another person who had gained Kasa’s attention in a different way was Conrad Weller. In the short intervals when the soldier came back to the castle from his vain searches for his king, Kasa always spent some time with him. The brunet also seemed to find comfort in their discussion. Somehow they understood each other well and became friends of a sort.  
  
But overall, it was with Gisela that Kasa would spend the largest part of his time. It was from her that he heard of the latest news, or from the castle’s rumours. It was with her that he worked in companionable silence.  
  
Then one day: "Sir von Bielefeld received a letter today," she told him as they were changing bed sheets together.  
  
"Oh? Who was it from?"  
  
"From princess Greta. Apparently she will be staying with Geigen Hubert‘s family a bit longer."  
  
This was someone Kasa never heard about. "Who is she? This princess Greta?"  
  
Gisela looked up, slightly surprised that he had never heard about her, but since he was a foreigner and had lived in a monastery before, it must be possible. "She is the thirteen-year-old daughter of Wolfram and his Majesty," she explained.  
  
"What!?" Kasa let everything he had in his hands fall on the floor. "They have a daughter? A thirteen-year-old daughter?" This news seemed to come as a big shock for him. "And they are not married yet?"  
  
Gisela laughed.  Even without seeing his eyes behind his wooden hat, she could see how surprised he was. She could not speak to explain anything to him, so hard she was laughing.  
  
Finally, after she had calmed down some and wiped her eyes, she spoke to him with laugher in her voice. "She is their adopted daughter, Kasa."  
  
Slowly she explained to him how the young human had come into their lives, and how the king had adopted her. But her conclusion was more serious. "But you are right somehow. It has been a bit more than three years now that his Majesty and Wolfram were betrothed. And they still are not married."  
  
"Why?" Kasa asked. He did not understand this situation.  
  
Gisela seemed somewhat reluctant to answer, but she still did. "For the longest time, his Majesty claimed he did not like men. He has stopped now, but I still don‘t believe he loves anyone."  
  
Kasa stayed where he was, taken aback.  
  
"Oh, don’t misunderstand me," she went on. "He loves all of us. He is a great king. But…" She went to the open window and looked up at the sky. "His soul has been haunted with the will to stop the wars and not hurt anyone for the past years. I don’t think he has opened his heart to this kind of love yet."  
  
"You mean he doesn‘t love Wolfram? I mean Sir von Bielefeld?" Kasa was shocked.  
  
"Neither him, nor Sir Weller, or anyone I know," she calmly answered. "His Majesty is somewhat naïve when it comes to matters of the heart. I think he has not even realised yet how much some people love him."  
  
They had resumed their task in silence after that. Those news opened new perspectives for Kasa. He had a new angle from which to consider things. The Maou did not love Wolfram von Bielefeld either? The Maou did not like men? The Maou had a human daughter?  
  
Now more than ever, Kasa asked himself a question that had worried him from the start. Why did Wolfram von Bielefeld never leave the castle to search for his fiancé in person?   
  
He remembered the blond prince’s outraged tone as he had suggested he would come back to such a beautiful person. Did he really love the king or was he infatuated with the idea he had of him?   
  
Was the Maou really that oblivious to his retainer’s feelings? The more he heard about his person, the less Kasa understood him.  
  
In the following days, Kasa asked more questions about the king, his habits, likes and dislikes, the way he behaved, the world where he came from. But the more he heard, the more it seemed that Gisela had been right.  
  
Was it really possible that the Maou had never been in love? Was it possible that the Maou never understood the feelings people might have for him?  
  
Could it be the reason why he had not come back yet?  
  
~*****~  



	8. Falling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name: Kasa. Gone on a mission to Shinmakoku’s capital and castle, he stayed with the demons.

~*****~

As time went by, it seemed that the demons were losing hope again. They had been with no news of their king for so many days ! The strange arrogant black-haired sage seemed to be the only one who would encourage them on.

The last time Kasa had managed to speak with Wolfram, he had tried to reassure him again that his fiancé should be alive, but he had not managed to spur the blond demon’s interest.

Even Conrad Weller spent less and less time on patrols, coming back more often to the castle. It seemed the man still had hope that his king was alive, but he seemed more resigned than anything, ready to wait until he came back to them.

He would spend more time with Kasa, coming to look for him in the infirmary, sometimes helping him carry his buckets of laundry.

"I can carry them ! I‘m not that useless," Kasa would protest. But the brown-haired soldier would only smile further and still go right ahead. Apparently it distracted him from morose thoughts about the Maou.

Sometimes they would find some quiet place and talk. Conrad liked to speak about his king, and Kasa found himself learning more about the young man. With Kasa, Conrad dared speak of his forbidden love.

In return Kasa confided in Conrad about his impressions on the castle’s inhabitants. They spoke of their common worry for Wolfram. How he pushed everyone away when they attempted to speak with him about his feelings. How it was not healthy for him.

~*****~

Then one day, Conrad Weller came to the infirmary and happened upon Gisela.

"Good afternoon, Gisela. Have you seen Kasa ?" He greeted her.

"Ah. He must be in the back. I had him do some laundry for me," she answered.

When the half-demon went to look however, he was confronted with a picture he did not expect.

Propped against the side of a pile of sheets, Kasa was sleeping. His hat was hiding his face completely, and he kind of looked like one of those Mexicans Conrad had seen slumbering during the warmest hours of the day when he had arrived on Earth.

By his side, the pile of laundry looked immense in comparison and Conrad smiled. "Kasaneru,(1)" he whispered.

A sense of peace he had not felt in a long timed filled him as he started his friend’s work in his stead. He could not help but wonder what kept the foreign monk here, but he would certainly not mind if he stayed longer. Maybe he would at least stay until Yuuri came back. The Maou would certainly appreciate the man’s conversation.

(1) Kasaneru: to pile up. Neru: to sleep.

~*****~

Meanwhile Kasa found himself thinking about the brown-haired soldier. He really liked spending time with him. They had a closeness he did not find with Gisela. He was the only person he could really confide in here. Yet he had not told him that he had no memories of his past: Conrad seemed unconcerned with it and was content to speak about his instead.

Conrad was a kind-hearted person. It seemed that everyone could enjoy this person’s company. Kasa certainly did.

It would be easy to fall in love with this man, Kasa thought. But then he would remind himself that the brunet was in love with his Majesty Yuuri ; the same Majesty which belonged to the very blond prince Wolfram.

Since his conversations with Conrad had become more regular, the time he spent Wolfram-watching had found itself reduced. Kasa did not mind much. He still enjoyed his moments at the balcony, spying on the young prince below, but even during those times he found his mind drifting, towards the king, towards Conrad.

Conrad also seemed to enjoy the moments he spent with Kasa. It was often he who came searching for him, in the infirmary or elsewhere. Kasa liked their time together. The brown-haired soldier seemed more and more relaxed around him, at peace. Gradually, the tortured face he had had on their second meeting was disappearing into a heart-warming smile.

~*****~

Then Conrad’s mood seemed to change, something was bothering him. Kasa could not understand why at first, since the man would not tell him about it.

"Don‘t worry," he would say in an evasive way instead. "It‘s nothing."

It most certainly was not. But Kasa had no clue as to what might be the current problem. It had been two weeks already since Conrad last went on a long search for the Maou, maybe he thought he should go back ? Whatever the reason, Kasa did not like to see Conrad suffer like that.

~*****~

"If it‘s about the king…" He began one day, when he could not bear to look at -- or mostly hear -- Conrad moping anymore without doing anything. But Conrad interrupted him: it seemed he finally had decided to speak about it.

"I don’t love you," he said. "I can‘t."

There was such a hurt, so much pleading in his voice that Kasa’s heart went out to the man. But at the same time he could feel it pounding in his chest, because Conrad’s tone was just saying the contrary of his words. It was then that Kasa realised that he had fallen for the brunet, that he had been falling for a long time already. He both relished and hated the hope and sadness those words brought to him.

"Because you love him," he said, looking at nothing in particular inside his hat.

Conrad did not deny it.

Kasa went on. "You know, you still can love different persons, even if it’s in different way. And no one can ask you to forget him -- as if you could --" Kasa let out a small sad laugh. "I wouldn’t anyway."

"Kasa, I…" Conrad’s voice was apologetic but Kasa did not let him go on.

"When I first met you, you know, when I arrived here, I thought you were his fiancé," he confessed, laughing embarrassedly. Conrad’s lips drew a small sad smile, but he said nothing.

"So I understand you wouldn‘t stop loving him," Kasa concluded seriously.

They stayed seated together, silent for a while, before Conrad opened his mouth again. "But when I’m with you, I can only think of you. I only remember Yuuri when we speak about him, or when I’m away…" He trailed off.

Kasa thought then that his heart might be irrevocably lost. But when the king came back, if what he had heard from Gisela was true, if the king one day found out that he loved Conrad after all, Kasa knew that himself would not stand a chance. Conrad would go back to him, and forget him. Still, Kasa could do nothing but stay until then.

"It‘s not fair to you," Conrad whispered.

"Life doesn‘t seem to be fair," Kasa stated in return.

"How can you be so distant ? Even from your own life," Conrad wondered.

"Maybe it‘s because I‘m a foreigner," he explained.

Kasa did not tell him that it might be because he had no memories of his past. It was not something he was very proud of, it made him vulnerable. Besides, he did not want to be recognised anymore. His past was not important to who he was now. He wanted to stay here, to remain with Conrad. And if Conrad could find it in his heart to love him -- even a little -- then he would keep ignoring the small worry in his head: had he already loved someone -- before -- elsewhere ?  



	9. Let me call your name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name: Kasa. Gone on a mission to Shinmakoku’s capital and castle, he stayed with the demons.

~*****~

A few more days passed with no news of the king. Ever since they had acknowledged their feelings for each other, Kasa and Conrad would spend nearly every free minute they had in each other’s company.

They had spoken on the subject again, been somewhat more explicit about this attraction which existed between them. Kasa had tried to make sure that Conrad understood that he would not try to compete with Yuuri in his heart. Conrad had been grateful for this, but at the same time it made him understand how much he cared for the foreign monk. In his head, he could not help but draw the parallel: like he himself had been ready to withdraw completely in favour of Wolfram if Yuuri ever explicitly choose his brother, Kasa was ready to do it for him.

Even if it was not the same, Conrad could not deny he loved Kasa.

Still, they had not kissed. The hat that Kasa could not remove would prevent any decent kiss, and they had not reached the level of intimacy that would allow another kind of kissing yet.

~*****~

They had spent so much time in each other’s company that they were the last persons to learn that they were the object of the latest gossip of the castle’s rumour mill.

Conrad discovered it one night when, entering the dinner room, he happened upon both his brothers and Gunther. They turned to look at him when he arrived, frowning disapprovingly or slightly embarrassed: they had been speaking about him.

"How could you be associating with him !" Gunther had started ; it seemed he was the most outraged of the three. "He is but a human, what’s more a foreigner !"

Conrad was so shocked that he let them speak. He had never imagined that Kasa could inspire so much animosity ; that his relationship with him could. He had expected support and understanding from his family, his friends…

"You are worth more than him. He is no one, you deserve better."

This was the proverbial last straw. Conrad’s anger had risen through all the insults that the absent Kasa had suffered in the past minutes, but he could not contain it anymore.

"Who ?" He seethed. "Yuuri ?"

It was their turn to fall silent, aghast. His older brother and Gunther seemed shocked that he was using the king's name so freely. In fact it had come naturally to his mouth: it was the way he called the Maou in his mind ; his anger had caused him to bypass the control he usually exerted on its expression.

Wolfram had paled. He had not been as vehement either about the situation as the others had. And at the name of his fiancé he seemed to reconsider. With careful words he tried to placate his older brothers. Did their mother not promote free love ? Wasn’t the Maou trying to build a world of peace and free travel ?

Surprised but relieved, Conrad let him convince them. Then, reluctantly, Gunther gave in. Still he insisted they do things the proper way, as was befitting the son of a queen. They would hold an engagement party the following week.

~*****~

As he left the room, Conrad was still under the shock. He had not yet fully comprehended the changes that had come to his life. His relationship with Kasa had become public, official even, in a matter of minutes. In those minutes he had realised that he had abandoned all hope for his unrequited and forbidden love of Yuuri in favour of the foreign monk.

Without aim he wandered trough the castle dwelling on those thoughts, before he decided to go back to Kasa: he had to tell him, to warn him, to explain things to him. Would Kasa forgive him that such a thing as a formal engagement had been arranged without his presence ?

~*****~

Conrad needn’t have worried. Kasa did not mind too much and understood him: he had heard of the rumours from Gisela before ; he had thought Conrad knew of them too. He just had been saddened by the lack of confidence towards Conrad their reaction showed. Inside though, he was near ecstatic: Conrad had taken his defence, Conrad loved him, Conrad would officially be his betrothed. Still he was no such fool as to believe Conrad might forget his king.

The following morning, Kasa happened upon Wolfram in one of the corridors. The blond demon seemed to have been waiting for him to appear. Maybe he did not feel uncomfortable around him anymore, now that he knew that Kasa had Conrad and would not pointedly pursue him as he had tried to in the past.

"You‘d better take care of him," he said in an abrupt way that could not hide his care for his older brother.

"Of course," Kasa answered.

"He needed someone," Wolfram added pensively.

"You too," Kasa retorted.

"I have the Maou," Wolfram answered, on the defensive.

"You miss him a lot," Kasa mused.

"Yes."

"Have you considered the fact that he might not come back ?" He asked, concerned.

"Yes," Wolfram murmured sadly. Apparently he had, and Kasa did not like to hear such sadness, nor to imagine the hurt look on the beautiful face.

"You know you can talk to me anytime, right ?" He asked. "After all we will soon be brothers."

"Brothers," Wolfram repeated, dejected, obviously thinking about his older brothers. "Yes."

They stayed together a few more moments before Wolfram left. Kasa felt sad that he himself was not alone while the blond demon was, and he hoped for his sake that the king would come back soon.

~*****~

The preparations for the feast were soon organised. Friends and family were called to attend, as well as nobilities. The days passed quickly and soon it was the eve of the day before the ball.

The ball ?

"There will be dancing ?" Kasa had really not expected this. With his hat it would be troublesome. He could not dance with anyone wearing it. He would look like a fool. He could not even dance in the first place. "I don‘t want to !"

Conrad had not thought this would be a problem, but to Kasa it was. "I‘ll be with you," he tried to convince him, in vain.

"I will be the centre of attention, not you !" Kasa exclaimed.

This was their first real disagreement. "I‘m not sure I want to go," Kasa concluded, darkly.

Conrad just looked at him, saddened, but Kasa could not see the look on his face from under his hat. Conrad was too nice a person to ask ‘even for me ? ’ and so they remained standing like this, silent, together and yet separated by mutual incomprehension.

"Goodbye, Conrad," Kasa finally said after what seemed an eternity to both of them.

"Are you leaving ?" Conrad asked, suddenly afraid. "Are you angry with me ?"

"I‘m not angry with you Conrad." The young man’s voice was calm and reasonable, but placating and firm. "I just want to stay by myself to think quietly for a while."

_I‘m not angry with you Conrad. I just want to stay by myself to think quietly for a while._

Conrad froze. Yuuri had said those words exactly. Just before he disappeared. He had said that and Conrad had let him be alone and never seen him since.

Suddenly Conrad saw the young man before him differently. He saw the familiar silhouette, only with different clothes and a hat. The voice resonating inside the hat even had familiar echoes if you paid attention.

Kasa turned and slowly walked a few feet away while Conrad stood there, petrified.

When it seemed that the boy with the hat was intent on leaving his immediate company however, Conrad woke from his trance. He could not let him disappear from his life again.

Stricken with despair, hope, joy, sadness, love and misery altogether he extended his arms towards the retreating figure and shouted:

"YUURI !"

 

\--------------  



	10. Out of context

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri fell into a spring of oblivion and doesn’t remember anyone or anything of his past, not even his own name. Furthermore he now has a big hat on his head which hides his face. Yuuri stayed at a monastery and got a new name: Kasa. Gone on a mission to Shinmakoku’s capital and castle, he stayed with the demons.

_Stricken with despair, hope, joy, sadness, love and misery altogether he extended his arms towards the retreating figure and shouted:_

_"YUURI !"_

 

~*****~

The small silhouette with the hat stopped abruptly and froze as well. Then, slowly, quietly, he fell down like a tree. As he hit the ground, his hat rolled away, as if it had but just been put upon his head and never fixed to it, revealing the youth‘s black hair.

Finally finding his legs again, Conrad rushed to the fallen king’s side, softly gathering him in his arms.

"Yuuri, Yuuri," he repeated over and over again, tears running unnoticed from his eyes. He was beating himself up for not noticing earlier, for not guessing, for failing Yuuri. "I‘m sorry, I‘m sorry," he whispered.

Yuuri’s face was pale and his eyes were closed, but he was conscious. Slowly, he opened wide black eyes, looked at Conrad, blinked and closed them again.

Conrad took that as a sign to act and stood up, scooping the king in his arms, ready to bring him back to the others, to his kingdom, to someplace more comfortable than the cold ground.

But as he started towards the main entrance Yuuri stopped him.

"No. To my room," he said in a feeble voice, tilting his head towards a smaller door, closer to the tower where he had lived as Kasa.

Conrad stopped, indecisive, torn between the part of him that wanted to go reassure the others and Yuuri’s obvious wish to remain alone for some more time. He did not hesitate long.

Looking around, he had noticed that things had rolled out of the hat and onto the ground: black clothes and Yuuri’s blue pendant. Careful not to drop Yuuri, he bent to pick everything up before he obeyed, carrying his king upstairs to the small room in the side tower.

~*****~

Gently, Conrad lay his king on the bed before he closed the door. Then he came back to the young man, sat on the bed and took his hand, wondering about his health.

Physically, Yuuri seemed to be all right, but his lost gaze accounted that not everything was right. The young man seemed lost in his memories coming back.

Carefully, Conrad pushed Yuuri’s hair to the side, away from his eyes. "I‘m sorry," he repeated.

He was apologising for everything: for not having found Yuuri, not having recognised him, for telling him his feelings, for the state he now saw him in.

Yuuri’s eyes were darkening, he looked more lively by the second. Then, after a short while, he turned his head to look at Conrad again.

"Don’t be sorry," he said.

"But I did not recognise you," Conrad regretted.

Yuuri shook his head. "If you wore a hat, acted like you did not know me and met me in a different context, I don‘t think I would have recognised you either," he explained. "Anyway you still did." His lips curled in a small shy smile.

"I‘m sorry." This time Yuuri understood Conrad was apologising about the rest, about his feelings for Yuuri.

"I don’t mind. It‘s all right," Yuuri tried to placate him, putting his hand on Conrad‘s arm.

"Don‘t you want to go tell them ?" Conrad asked. He felt egoistical, guilty, to keep Yuuri to himself like this.

"No." Yuuri shook his head. "Not yet. I need to sort my memories ; it‘s all scrambled up."

Uncomfortable, Conrad made to stand up. "I‘ll leave you alone, then." He would not have gone further than behind the door to guard it anyway, but if Yuuri needed peace and quiet...

Yuuri sat up and grasped his hand. "No."

Yuuri remembered the last few weeks very clearly, and now he remembered a lot more things, now he knew who he was. He thought back to his wish to know what everyone would think of him if they had met him differently and realised that more than putting him out of context for the others, this adventure had also put the others out of their usual context for him.

He knew who he was. He knew what he felt. He knew what he wanted.

He wanted to kiss Conrad, to make love to him. However, just as he bent closer to the brunet to do start doing so, Conrad’s arm stopped him.

"Let‘s make love, Conrad."

"Please, no," Conrad pleaded with him. "Not now, not like this." Not when no one else knew Yuuri was back, not when Yuuri’s mind was still confused from his memories coming back. "You would regret it."

Yuuri looked hard at Conrad before he reluctantly nodded. It was Conrad who would regret it, not him, but he agreed.

He leaned forward to put his arms around Conrad and hugged him firmly instead.

~*****~

The following morning, Conrad woke up by Yuuri’s side, in Yuuri’s arms. They had just held each other the whole night long.

Yuuri opened his eyes only seconds afterwards.

"Good morning." Yuuri smiled.

Conrad looked at Yuuri’s face for a few seconds, trying to find out if Yuuri had recovered all his memories yet, but he could not determine it.

"Good morning, your Majesty."

Yuuri winced.

"Yuuri."

Yuuri relaxed. Then he looked directly into Conrad’s eyes, and told him his wishes.

~*****~

Yuuri had wished to remain hidden until the evening. So Conrad had gone back to his normal occupations. He had spent most of the day at his desk, writing letters to the troops still searching for the king, calling them back. It also allowed him to avoid the others: he did not like the fact that he had to hide the truth from them, and yet he had to.

It was hard to believe that Yuuri was really back ; that Yuuri was Kasa, that Yuuri had told him he loved him back.

The day seemed to last an eternity before the ball finally began.

~*****~

They waited one hour after the music had started before finally heading up for the main hall. Hand in hand they walked through the deserted corridors. Yuuri took comfort in the warm contact. He had wanted to wait to be sure to meet everyone at once, but he was afraid. He was somewhat ashamed of his childish request to hide for a whole day, of the fact that he would enter the ballroom at Conrad’s arm. A pink hue tinted his cheeks.

Meanwhile Conrad was persuading himself he was just walking Yuuri back to the others, to his younger brother. Despite what Yuuri had said about loving him, he could not really believe it.

As they neared the music-filled hall, they met servants. Everyone stopped what they were doing to turn on their passage. The Maou, it was the Maou, his Majesty was back, walking hand in hand with Sir Weller to Sir Weller‘s engagement party.

Then finally, they arrived to the door. The double door was open. Catching a glimpse of Conrad and the small silhouette by his side, the announcer started: "Sir Weller and …" He meant to say his fiancé, but then he fully saw who this person was and nearly choked. He cleared his throat and announced louder: "His Majesty the Maou."

He almost needn’t have announced. Already everyone was turning towards the pair, frozen, bewildered. Where they had expected Kasa the foreigner to come in with the soldier, stood his Majesty. Yuuri was dressed in black, in his usual uniform, not the formal party one, with his free hand he was carrying Kasa’s wooden hat.

A feeling of certainty went through the crowd: Kasa had been the Maou all along. His Majesty was back.

They advanced towards the centre of the room, towards Wolfram, Gwendal, Gunther, and when they arrived, they stopped, Yuuri did not let go of Conrad‘s hand.

"You traitor," Wolfram stated.

Yuuri winced, taken aback, but quickly recovered. His tone was assured and decisive when he answered. "Yes." He had found a decision and now was the time to affirm it.

"I can‘t believe it," Wolfram went on, strangely almost calm.

"I like you Wolfram," Yuuri tried to explain. "But it‘s not the same. This is a choice I must make."

Murata had been watching the situation unfold, smiling, but he sensed that Wolfram was quickly loosing his patience and intervened.

"How did he recover his memory ?" He asked loudly, to no-one in particular.

"I called out his name to him last night," Conrad replied.

Murata’s smile widened. " Hmm… kinky," he said in a suggestive way.

Conrad blushed and Yuuri’s eyes widened at Murata’s comment.

Wolfram’s eyes shot murder and he stormed out.

"Wolfram." Yuuri called after him, but the blond demon did not listen.

By his side, Conrad looked at him and shook his head with a sad smile. Yuuri grasped the man’s hand tighter for a second and kept looking in the direction in which Wolfram had disappeared. In that direction was Gisela and she made him a small sign not to worry: she would keep an eye on him.

Yuuri hoped from the bottom of his heart that Wolfram could find some closure. As for him, he decided to hold tightly to what he had found in those past months. It might not be easy at first, but he would not let go of what he had gained, or of who he wanted.

 

 

THE END

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Epilogue/Omake

Yosak Guerrier was a spy, and as such, it was not a difficult thing to notice suspicious behaviour. It was even more the case when the person who was trying to leave the castle on the sly was your lover. Interrupting his task, he quietly made to follow the Great Sage.

Once he was outside the castle, Murata Ken’s behaviour returned to its norm. He walked down the slope without ever noticing he was followed. Yosak walked behind at some distance until the Sage arrived near a small pond and stopped.

This was said to be the spring of oblivion where the Maou had disappeared a few months ago.

Ever since he had had the idea that the king might have simply lost his memory, the other black-haired youth had been distracted, or rather, focused on this problem. He had done researches about those springs and their water.

Maybe this trip was not suspicious after all. Murata Ken was just here to do some more studies. But when the young man kneeled and reached for the water, Yosak noticed that his lover did not have any recipient in hand. Concerned, he neared the pond, but the black-haired young man was already raising his hand to his mouth and drinking.

"Keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnn ! " Yosak shouted, rushing forwards, clasping the young man’s elbows in his hands.

Frantically, he shook the young man by the shoulders, repeating: "Your name is Murata Ken, your name is Murata Ken."

Murata stayed unfazed, seemingly unmoved by his lover’s panic, deep in thought. "Indeed it is."

Yosak stopped. Suddenly, after such an intense fear, he felt a rush of anger rise in him. "What did you think you were doing ?!" He shouted. "What if I had not been there ? Did you want to forget me ? What possessed you to do this ?"

Murata did not react to Yosak’s anger either. Finally, when the redhead started to vent off, Murata whispered softly: "I knew you would rescue me, I knew you were following me."

Yosak had lost his aggressiveness. "But why did you do that ?" He asked, defeated.

Murata let himself be pulled closer in the other man’s arms. "It was not you I was trying to forget," he murmured.

Yosak drew him even closer, then kissed him possessively. There were times he did not like to share the young Sage with his numerous memories.

After a while Murata whispered: "You needn‘t have worried anyway."

Yosak’s eyes twinkled mischievously. "Meaning I‘m unforgettable ?"

Murata snorted and gently swatted his chin. "Wouldn‘t that be troublesome for a spy ?" Then his smile disappeared and he remarked more seriously: "No, just meaning I‘m really cursed."

"How so ?"

Murata hid his eyes against the skin on Yosak’s neck. It was not the first time he regretted remembering all his previous lives. "I really _can‘t_ forget.". 

  
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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN : I'd like to thank [](http://hisoka44.livejournal.com/profile)[**hisoka44**](http://hisoka44.livejournal.com/)for beta-reading this story.


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